Why Is Rover Interfering in My Love Life?
You are on the couch with your new significant other, and things are starting to get romantic. Suddenly, the movie you were watching together is no longer relevant, and the bowl of popcorn youve been snacking from has been put aside. Suddenly, everything disappears and its just about you and your partner. You start hugging and kissing, and one thing leads to another . . . suddenly Rover barks, jumps up, and wedges himself in between the two of you. Oh, Rover! Go back to your place! you exclaim. Now, where were we?
Soon after, the scene repeats, and you end up shutting Rover in his crate or in another room. Your significant other asks you whats wrong with Rover, and you both naturally assume he is jealous. But do dogs really feel jealousy toward humans, or could there be a simpler explanation for this behavior?
Kissing, hugging, and other displays of human affection do not exist in the dog world, so it is unlikely that they would incite jealousy in a canine observer.
They Are ”Splitting” a Perceived Conflict
Some dogs may not feel comfortable watching their human being hugged and kissed and may feel the need to intervene by wedging their way in between the two parties in an attempt to deescalate what they perceive as a conflict. Turid Rugass, a Norwegian dog expert and author of a great book called On Talking Terms With Dogs: Calming Signals, reports that dogs tend to wedge themselves in between other dogs that appear to be in conflict in an effort to calm them down.
In the dog world, kissing and hugging do not exist, so your pet may have a hard time clearly understanding what is going on, particularly when the romantic behavior they observe is on the more passionate side. Dogs may interpret intense intimacy as something confrontational going on between you and your partner. Rover wedging his way in between you may be his way to calm you down and deescalate what he perceives to be a fight.
How to Change Your Dog’s Behavior
For dogs who are aggressive or overly anxious around intimacy, these situations are best addressed by a veterinarian, who can offer in-depth behavior modification using positive reinforcement training. But if your dog is interrupting your sex life in a nonthreatening, but still annoying manner, here are some strategies to help dissipate the conflict.
1. Give your dog an escape route. Some 43 percent of dogs share beds with their owners, according to the 2007 American Pet Products Association survey. And though you may enjoy cuddling in bed with your pet, for moments of human intimacy, remove the dog. Train him to relax in a separate area, like a crate or dog bed or in another room. Or simply give your dog a way out. “We’ve opted to make sure the door is always open, so they can have a solid exit strategy,” one owner says.
2. Institute a “no furniture” rule. Teach your dog to move off furniture, such as the couch or bed, when asked. Then, on a romantic night, you can tell the dog to stay off the furniture in a nonconfrontational manner. Direct the dog to his own resting spot instead and reward him for following directions.
3. Keep him busy. If your dog appears restless with your nighttime physical shenanigans, make your ‘busy time’ a busy time for your dog as well. Provide stuffed food puzzles or chew toys to keep him occupied.
4. Ignore bad behavior. If your pooch acts out or barks to get attention, ignore unwanted behavior and reward calm. Though barking may be more intense initially, when previously successful efforts to distract you no longer work, the dog’s response will soften. Redirect and reward his focus when he’s relaxing or contentedly occupied with something acceptable, like a toy.
5. Do some role playing. If your dog is an uncomfortable witness to gestures of affection, like hugging and kissing, change the association by setting up pretend scenarios. Break up the interaction to a level the dog easily tolerates, such as lightly touching with one outstretched arm with both people facing forward. Reward calm behavior, especially relaxation behaviors, like going to his mat or bed. Over time, make the scenario resemble the real event, touching with both arms, turning toward one another and getting closer to each other. Or, with kissing your romantic partner, begin with just orienting to face one another. Then, lean toward each other. With kisses, start with only a light, momentary kiss and add length only as the dog happily anticipates a reward instead of rushing to react.
Until your dog has been conditioned to be comfortable around your public displays of affection, keep the dog out of view to prevent him from becoming upset and continuing unwanted behavior.
Sign up and make sure you are always on top of the most important info for you and your pets.
14 Signs Your Dog Doesn’t Love You (Even if You Think They Do)
Why is it that dogs are man’s best friend? Every dog owner probably has their own unique answer to that question, but the unconditional love that our dogs show us has to be up there with the biggest reasons. Whether they’re watching for your arrival at the window or waiting outside your bedroom every morning, they give their humans unwavering affection day in, day out and seem to get boundless joy from nothing more than simply being in our company.
In fact, dogs have so much love to give that sometimes they can struggle to make room for anyone else. According to experts, many breeds of dogs are prone to jealousy in response to their owners’ attention being diverted. Their naturally affectionate personalities can prevent them from stepping back, which can often lead to your dog displaying jealous tendencies towards you or your partner. It’s certainly worth keeping everyone happy – 61% of dog owners think their pet impacts the health of their relationship, and over 50% of dog-owning couples believe that their pooch encourages them to spend more time together.
Jealousy in dogs can be triggered by many things – from huge upheavals, like the arrival of a new baby, to everyday distractions like scrolling through too much social media on your phone. But with Valentine’s Day just around the corner, it’s the perfect time to think about whether your significant other and your canine best friend could be jostling for your affections.
It might be the most romantic time of the year for us, but whatever romance you’ve got planned for the big day, make sure that your dog isn’t left feeling jealous of your partner. Carefully planning activities that can involve the two of you and your dog – such as a romantic walk, a doggy double date or even a cuddle on the sofa – will make for a stress-free special day. In order to ensure a more harmonious relationship between the three of you this Valentine’s Day and beyond, it’s important not only to be able to spot the signs of jealousy, but to know how to respond to them.
Here are the tell-tale signs of doggy jealousy to keep an eye out for along with solutions to your problem provided by Ben Cunningham, Behavioural Specialist and Education Manager at GroomArts.