And probably the hardest of all …
Sometimes it really is YOU. You made the mistake of getting a puppy when you truly weren’t ready. You thought you were ready but now you regret getting the puppy. That’s OK.
Remember, puppies get adopted easily and they adapt easily. Just be honest with yourself and the place you got your puppy from.
If you feel you need to return the puppy, it will be OK. A puppy will get adopted almost immediately.
I can’t tell anyone what to do, but despite the stigma out there with returning or “giving up” a dog, it’s not smart to just put up with a puppy for the next 10+ years if he’s causing you, your family or your other pets that much stress or even danger.
This is not a good situation for you or your family, and it’s not a good situation for the puppy, either. The puppy deserves to go to a home where he can be truly loved and a valued family member.
What I’m trying to say is second guessing yourself about adding a new dog is normal. Usually any “doubts” are just growing pains you can work through.
But if you truly need to re-home or return your puppy, that is OK too.
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Is it normal to regret getting a puppy?
Yep, it’s fairly normal to regret getting a puppy or dog. You’re not a bad person!
If you’ve recently added a new dog or puppy to your family and you’re wondering if you’ve made a mistake, just know that others go through the same feelings.
At least I have and I’m an experienced dog person whose life pretty much revolves around dogs! I knew what I was getting myself into and I STILL have regrets.
You make adjustments, you get creative, you work through the problems.
I recommend you do this if you’re having second thoughts about your puppy:
What else would you add to this list?
When does a puppy get easier?
Well, young dogs are a lot of work too because they’re bigger and have a lot of energy. But the good news is that there ARE solutions for the puppy blues! Read on to find out what you can do to make things better.
Puppy Regret: Does your new dog have you all stressed and overwhelmed? Watch this
People who get puppies usually imagine cuddles and play and “loyalty” and companionship. But most puppies start off with some added features – sharp puppy teeth, constant chewing, barking, peeing and pooping in the house. Oh. My. Gosh. The PEE! It’s everywhere. Glance at the dog and she pees. Reach for the dog, more pee. Think of the dog – yep. Pee. You’re up all hours of the night taking the dog out. Crate training isn’t going as well as you expected. He might seem timid around strangers or other dogs. He vomited in the car – again.
We dog trainers sometimes get calls or texts from clients or friends who are disillusioned about their new dog. Sometimes, they are even in tears.
I understand. Really, I do. I’ve been there. I’ve had puppies myself and I have an endless stream of puppies here in our house for training. It’s hard. It’s exhausting. It’s frustrating. There are plenty of times it is NOT FUN.
So let’s try something. I’d like you to momentarily forget about your puppy (wait – your puppy is someplace safe, right? In your lap or napping in her crate or playpen? Or being watched by someone else? Okay, let’s continue).
Think of a dog you’ve liked in the past. Maybe it was a dog you grew up with. Maybe it was a dog you had previously. Or perhaps it’s a friend’s dog. You know, the type who’s exactly what you want. Relaxed. Friendly. Obedient. House trained! He plays fetch with you. She sleeps at your feet when you visit your friend. He’s a very good dog.
Do you have a dog in mind? Seriously, pause for a second and think about that dog for a minute or two before you continue reading. What’s their name? What do you like so much about them? That’s what you had in mind when you got a dog, right?
Well, let me tell you something. That wonderful dog was once a puppy who peed in the house, chewed everything with sharp puppy teeth, didnt come when called, and probably jumped on people instead of sitting politely. Id be stunned if the dogs owners didnt regret at times getting a puppy and might have even considered other options for the dog (rehoming it, taking it back to where they got it, etc.). Now, the owners of this perfect dog probably won’t admit that – in large part because they probably just dont remember feeling that way. The years have a way of erasing the memories of difficult times and replacing them with more recent memories of dogs cuddling next to us on the couch, tromping alongside us on a hike, and making us laugh with some utterly ridiculous thing theyve done.
That good older dog GOT good with time, patience, consistency, and (hopefully) love. Dogs have to learn to fit into our lives. We all have different expectations and household rules.
I think it’s completely reasonable to want a dog to pee outside. But why in the world would a young puppy be expected to know that? And how should a puppy know that the rubber-coated microphone cord under my desk isn’t a chew toy like the rubber coated ball that I also provided? (That’s a real example from a recent failure on my part to carefully observe a visiting puppy – even professionals make these mistakes.)
The owners of all those “perfect” dogs had sleepless nights, frustrating moments, and thoughts about sending the dog back where they got it. So what you’re feeling is normal. And completely okay.
You have every right to feel how you feel. Puppies are a lot of work. Some, even more than others (and yes, there’s that rare “easy” puppy). I’d be remiss not to mention that the puppy isn’t being intentionally difficult. I can assure you that no dog wakes up in the morning determined to make your life miserable or to show you they are the boss. They behave the way they do because it produces consequences that work for them. With gentle training, we can teach them other behaviors that we’d prefer they do instead of the ones they’ve chosen. There may be times to feel angry – but there’s never a time to act angry towards a dog. Don’t be mean, train the dog. If you don’t know how, get some help. Ask me or check out some of the resources found here.
With training, consistency, kindness, and a good dose of patience, your dog can grow into the dog you think of when you hear the the words