Can you over socialize a dog? Find Out Here

Dog socialization mistake: Not investing in training

One of my favorite writers, Jon Katz, wrote that dog owners will often spend hundreds of dollars buying an exotic purebred or designer dog, but then they won’t spend a dollar on training that dog.

People will also pay $400 to adopt a “rescue dog,” but are most of them willing to spend money on training? Probably not.

I’m not saying you have to invest a bunch of money into dog training, but you do need to invest your time. My favorite way to train my dog is to do it myself. I usually train my dog on walks around the neighborhood.

Still, I do find group obedience classes valuable, even to those who “know everything” about training a dog. Classes are an easy way to work with your dog around other dogs. There are few scenarios in the “real world” that allow you to do this in a controlled way.

I know training classes can get expensive, but if you can swing even one six-week session of weekly classes per year, it is well worth it. They’re not for all dogs, of course. Hiring a private trainer for one-on-one instruction can also be very helpful.

Can you over socialize a dog?

My dog walking buddies, Ruby and Mack

We often leave our dogs far to long playing, which means they become hyper aroused and find it difficult to calm down, if anyone knows what an overtired toddler is like it’s exactly the same. Some dogs even though you can see they are exhausted will not let up. These are usually the hyperaroused dogs or the ones with addictive personalities!

What I aim for and I explain to the clients I work with are the nice “hi” sniff butts “bye” interactions where the dogs have a short relaxed interaction like we do, when we politely say “hello” to our neighbours when we pass them by or where we exchange small pleasantries and move on. Standing in the middle of park chatting to other owners, or dog walkers that stand stationary whilst the dogs rough house for long time, is what I avoid, this often causes over arousal if you stand back and look at the group of dogs at least one of them often actually want to move on with their walk not stand stationary, after all there is so much more to explore. Standing in a group is unfair on the dogs that don’t want to be played with or have had enough. This kind of stress can send the dogs back home in a adrenaline filled hyper-aroused state, which means they sometimes find it difficult to relax. Sniffing and interacting with the environment is far more important for dogs for their emotional well being and tires them.

If another dog has run over to yours and yours clearly does not want to play i.e. looking away, turning away, walking away sniffing as if they are doing something else try and increase the distance between you and the other dogs owner, by moving in the direction you want to go this will help the dog (and the other owner) get a clear message both you and your dog do not want to engage and don’t be afraid to say “please can you get your dog”.

The problem is society put high unrealistic expectations on dogs, that they should get on with every dog they meet. This means we put a lot of pressure on dogs to socialise without really understanding what is appropriate and what is not. We don’t get on with everyone, there are people that can frustrate us or anger us and this is what happens with dogs. The first thing everyone does is tries to expose their puppy as much as possible to as many dogs as possible including going to puppy parties, having friends over with dogs, meet ups, dog walkers and more often this is too much. Some dogs just are not interested in playing with other dogs especially strangers, we don’t chat or play with all the strangers we meet, don’t force dogs to be social if they are not interested if however they are showing that they are uncomfortable by growling, barking or biting seek professional help. All interactions should be about choice and going at your puppies or dogs pace without pressurising them.

Sometimes it’s difficult to interrupt as both dogs will be concentrating on where the play may lead so try and wait for natural breaks in the play. The moment you get their attention call them over and then move on with your walk.

Recently, I read a blog that upset me — Lunch with Turid Rugas: Am I Driving My Dog Crazy, written by an obviously intelligent and caring dog owner, who blames herself for the unlikely likelihood that she ruined her dog Sadie with too much early socialization. My heart goes out to the author and Sadie and I feel that I must respond in case people misinterpret the facts to mean that early socialization can be damaging. Being fearful and anxious about people and the world can be crippling for dogs, especially if each day, they still have to confront their biggest fears — people and the world. Living with a fearful dog abruptly causes a lengthy lifestyle change and for many months and years, the owner’s life revolves around rehabilitation and protecting the dog from her fears. Most disturbing in this case is that Sadie’s mum is blaming herself for something for which she is entirely blameless. Feeling guilty and blaming oneself is basically delayed and self-inflicted punishment. As dog trainers, we know that delayed punishment doesn’t work and as people, we know that self-inflicted punishment is the most pernicious. Guilt does nothing to turn the clock back and preventively undo what has been done, nor does it do anything to resolve an existing problem. However, self-blame is an extraordinarily successful way to torture yourself. Even when we make mistakes, which we occasionally do because we are human, we must always objectively and representatively evaluate our occasional, inevitable and unintentional mistakes along with our usual multitude of successes. You did what you thought was best at the time. You gave your puppy what every puppy requires — ample opportunity to socialize. You did all the right things. But poor Sadie simply wasn’t sufficiently prepared. It is so very unlikely that too much early socialization exacerbated Sadie’s fearfulness. On the contrary, Sadie’s ongoing universal fearfulness and anxiety only accentuates the crucial need for even more early socialization. Sadie didn’t require less socialization after you brought her home; she required MORE socialization BEFORE you brought her home. Poor Sadie was scared of everything and everybody from the moment you brought her home at ten weeks of age. For a puppy to be fearful at eight weeks of age, let alone ten weeks of age, is abnormal. Whatever the breeder had done up to this point was either woefully insufficient, or contraindicated. As a result, by just ten weeks of age, Sadie did not require normal happy-go-lucky, puppy turbo-socialization. Instead, Sadie required immediate and emergency rehabilitation and social therapy. Socialization is an ongoing process. Specifically, socialization in once you bring a pup home, is all about continuing to socialize already socialized puppies. It shouldn’t have to be about trying to rehabilitate grossly under-socialized puppies. After neonatal handling by lots of people, especially men and strangers (neonatal pups can feel and smell even though they cannot see or hear too well), pups are ready to meet even more people for handling and training before they are eight weeks old. Then the eight-week-old puppy is ready for intensive socialization in the safety of her new home. Then the three-month old puppy is prepared to meet the world at large on walks, in puppy class and in dog parks to prepare her to weather the social storm of adolescence. Nonetheless, socialization is not about hurriedly forcing a fearful dog to interact with numerous puppies, people and different situations. Instead socialization comprises providing a dog with a multitude of opportunities to explore the infinite sensory and social world at its own speed, carefully monitoring the puppy’s progress and promptly intervening if the puppy is not socializing at lightning speed. Off-leash puppy classes are designed to identify potential and incipient problems early on so that they may be immediately resolved. For example, bullying (over-the-top play styles) and fearfulness must be resolved week one, or they will only become progressively more difficult to resolve as each week goes by. However, Sadie did not have a potential or incipient problem. By the time that Sadie came to live with you, she had a full-blown, universal fear of the world at large. I have immense respect for so much of what Turid says. She is a champion of empathy and trying to understand the dog’s point of view. In response to Sadie being enrolled in puppy kindergarten to expose her to lots of different environments, Turid reportedly said, “That’s way too much! It’s over-stimulating for a puppy. Dogs need time to go at their own pace.” However, I worry that anyone reading this might think, “Wow! Puppy classes can damage my puppy and so I won’t enroll her in a class.” Yes, we have to let dogs move at their own pace but usually, socialized puppies move at a turbo-pace and nothing is too frightening for them. Fast to the point that with most puppies they may be flooded with social stimuli… something that you would never dream of doing with an adult dog, or a fearful puppy. It is very difficult to over-stimulate a two- to four-month-old socialized puppy and there is simply no need to slow things down. However, socializing a socialized puppy is very different from rehabilitating an insufficiently socialized (shy or fearful) puppy or dog. Whenever a puppy shows any signs of reticence or vacillation whatsoever, it’s time to raise a red flag and slow down. Something is severely wrong. So, it’s time to intervene and resolve the potential problem pronto. Because of an impoverished early environment, or because of extreme sensitivity, or both, some puppies need more time to hide and peek and watch the world go by in order to learn, not only that people are harmless but also, that people are actually enjoyable. But now, all this is water under the bridge; we cannot turn the clock backwards. Sadly, Sadie is still fearful and anxious about the world and we must do something about it right away. We must embark on a course of confidence-building exercises as soon as possible. For some remedial tips, I suggest you read Retreat ‘n Treat and Fearful Growling. In order to get Sadie to feel confident around people, the use of food lures and rewards is absolutely essential. For the next few months, make sure that Sadie ONLY eats from the hands of people — first from you, then friends and then from strangers. Do not waste valuable food rewards by ever feeding her from a bowl. Above all, don’t torture yourself with the past. Once you resolve Sadie’s fears, her newfound confidence and quality of life will make you cry with happiness. The journey that you will take together will teach you so much. Sadly though, Sadie’s situation is all too common — a predicament that is extremely unfair for dogs and extremely unfair for owners. Basically, at just ten weeks of age she was already so far behind in terms of her behavioral development and acquisition of social savvy. Owners must be aware that when they choose a puppy as early as eight weeks of age, either they may choose one that is well-socialized and just raring to go and hit the social scene, or they may choose one that is under-socialized and barely prepared for life in a family, let alone the world at large. In addition to producing dogs that are good anatomical specimens, breeders must raise puppies according to Open Paw’s Minimum Mental Health Guidelines so that they are well along their socialization journey by the time they are eight weeks old. Yes, we should absolutely socialize and train puppies, as early as possible. But yes, we should also try to feel their feelings in order to adjust the pace if necessary, so as to prevent or resolve their fears as quickly as possible.

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Socialize Your Reactive Dog With These Three Simple Steps

As a dog trainer and behaviour advisor that works on a one to one basis with my clients, I spend a lot of time in areas where people regularly socialise their dogs, whether that’s is a local park that consists of a rectangular patch of grass with a park in like Warrender, the woods, busy places like Ruislip Lido or Rickmansworth Aquadrome, country parks like Black Park, Langley Park, Denham Country Park, Large green spaces like Horsenden Hill or just a local walk round the block. One thing that is for sure is there is a huge dog owning community. As a behaviour advisor I know you have to look at every dog as an individual, every dog I come across or work with have completely different back grounds and upbringings which can also vary between dog to dog within the same household. One type of dog that has inspired me to write this blog is the number of Street Dogs I am now seeing as clients, most of the ones I have seen so far have lived on the streets so it’s vital that they can communicate effectively with other dogs, they mostly avoid conflict as much as possible as they need to stay uninjured and healthy to survive. These dogs come over here I find often have excellent body language but do find our dogs difficult to interact with initially, which can make the Street dog appear unsociable.

Dogs socialisation varies hugely, you can take 5 dogs that have all been to the same socialisation classes but all 5 could have a had a different experience; depending on their own emotional state generally and during the class, how the other dogs were, how their guardians handled them in the class, the guardians emotional state at the time, if anything spooked them in the class, stress that they had been through a few days before the class and so much more.

One piece of bad advice that goes around is, that you should let dogs get on with it “they will sort it out themselves”. This is a massive mistake and hugely unfair especially on puppies that are just finding out about the world of dogs and the different kinds of dog breeds there are, if they go down the park and get in trouble by every dog, do you think that they will continue to want to socialise with dogs. Using an older dog as a stooge dog, putting them in a position which makes them have to tell other dogs to back off is unfair too. Older dogs are sometimes in pain, do not have as much energy to play or interact anymore, which means they are far less tolerant understandably and what about the dog that has been attacked previously should they just be left get on with it with a dog that is intimidating them or over aroused and won’t take no for an answer. I am finding there are lots of dogs out there that play inappropriately and some owners, dog walkers and dog sitters do not recognise what is appropriate and what is not.

Now I can hear some people say they are dogs they will work it out, they will soon learn when another dog has had enough and this may have worked for your one particular dog. Unfortunately this is not always the case, I deal with many dogs thats companions have taken exactly that approach, with regards to their interaction with other dogs. You have the ones in the park that are allowed to run up (or can’t be stopped) to any dog whether the dog is on or off lead, these dogs are usually over aroused and often do not read other dogs body language well or are not sure how to interact so end up over the top. Now firstly if this dog has run up to an owner that has a dog that is not comfortable with other dogs not necessarily one that may fight (which generally stems from fear) but I mean the ones that throw them selves on their back and if that fails tries to get away as quickly as possible. This can be pretty traumatic for both dog and owner, leaving them in a state of stress for a few days or more. The dogs that bark and try to instigate play with every dog not leaving them alone, these dogs usually have played like this or have been allowed to play inappropriately with other dogs that play in the same way, allowing them to practice and be proficient in play that is not suitable with most dogs. On top of this we have breeds that are bred that can be over social, crosses that have low frustration tolerance and more. What’s not fair is these dogs often can be turned on regularly by other dogs and eventually can understandably get very offended when another dog growls, barks or bite to indicate they don’t want to play. I am then often called in to see the inappropriate player type dogs, as they have now started to understandably react back over time; as they are frustrated that the other dog didn’t play, appearing confused why they keep getting into trouble, they can often appear unpredictable and end up fighting during play due to high stress levels.

Now this is no fault of the dog guardians out there, it is likely that no one has told you what is appropriate or inappropriate, our gut instincts usually do but we often ignore this because of pressure other dog guardians put on us, they might say they are ok leave them be etc.. especially if you are a new owner as you will feel other dog owners know more than you. I will let you into a secret shh “just because someone has had dogs for thirty years, does not mean they have been getting it right or that they are an expert in dog body language” the average dog owners do not know the subtle signals dogs give way before they growl bark and bite.

Questionable Play Best to call your dog to you positively before things go too far. If you are not careful this could lead to fall out.

Play bows are also not always a sign to indicate they want to continue playing, sometimes it seems to be used to defuse a situation that might appear to be getting out of hand.

Appropriate Play This is reciprocated and there is a give and take aspect. The dogs are having fun. Dogs have relaxed body language and may appear a bit “goofy”. Playing chase is a sharing opportunity, where they may take it in turns. Do a consent test if you are not sure: hold the chaser and see if the other dog still wants to engage in play.

The owners that are naturals have it right you know the ones they just walk their dogs without thinking about it, they will say a brief “Hi” whilst continuing to walk their dog, their dogs often have great body language and interact with other dogs briefly but politely and may have a short brief play, which is much more like the interaction of how dogs are that live on the street and why there often is not as much conflict.