Are Dog Kisses Actually Signs of Affection?
Unfortunately, there’s no easy answer to dogs’ intentions when licking their people, but it seems to come down to whether your dog is seeking you out, or if you are seeking your dog out.
Hof explains, “It’s helpful to look at the context of the licking to better understand and pay attention to other signals besides the licking or the kiss, such as the dog approaching the owner and choosing to engage in the behavior despite having the option to move away or leave; or was the dog thrust upon and looking away and licking his lips as well?” In other words, forced affection on the part of the guardian can warp the true intention of a dog’s kiss – a dog will “kiss” your face to appease you and make go away rather than to display their love for you.
Hof offers the following important reminder: “it’s always best to invite your dog to approach you so that you feel more confident they’ve made that choice willingly. When you begin to respect your dog’s autonomy, you see more comfort and confidence in their behavior.” What you can count on as a result is knowing the way your dog behaves with you is genuine.
For safety reasons (and this is a hard one for many of us who share our lives with dogs), Hof states that it is not recommended for people to put their faces up to their dogs’ faces. Although this is often done as a sign of affection from us, it is very commonly invasive to our dogs and they may not appreciate it. This is where we most often see dogs licking or “kissing” their person’s face as a way for the dog to avoid conflict.
This “Kiss to Dismiss”, as coined by the Family Paws Organization, is often paired with a look away from the person and licking of lips. If you would like to have a close moment with your dog, invite them to do so with you, and if they want to come up to your face, they will – but if not, respect it when they say ‘no’. Obviously we want our dogs to be comfortable so it’s important to be thoughtful of how we physically show emotions to our dogs, so that our dogs don’t feel pressured to appease us through kisses.
Why Dogs Lick People
Affection: Theres a pretty good chance that your dog is licking you because it loves you. Its why many people call them “kisses.” Dogs show affection by licking people and sometimes even other dogs. Licking is a natural action for dogs. They learned it from the grooming and affection given to them as puppies by their mothers. Dogs might lick your face if they can get to it. If not, they might just go for any available patch of skin, such as hands, arms, legs, and feet. Some dogs tend to lick less than others. This does not necessarily mean that a dog is less affectionate if it does not lick. It might have just learned things differently as a puppy or just not prefer licking.
While we dont know for certain why dogs lick, most experts agree that there is probably a combination of reasons. Licking is not considered a serious behavior problem unless it bothers you. Knowing the reason for your dogs licking might even change the way you feel about it.
Attention-Seeking: Licking behavior that starts as affection often gets reinforced by a persons reaction: laughing, smiling, petting, etc. Maybe your dog is bored or lonely. There you are and it wants your attention. Even negative attention can encourage licking. When a dog is seeking attention, it will feel rewarded by any kind of attention, even the negative type. Pushing it away, saying “no,” or even punishing it still means youre not ignoring it. This can encourage licking.
Instinct: When wolves (and sometimes dogs in the wild) return to their pups after a meal, they regurgitate meat from the hunt. The pups, too young to hunt on their own, will lick the meat from around the mothers mouth. It is believed by some that this licking behavior has been passed down in the DNA, causing dogs to instinctively do it sometimes.
You Taste Good: Once that dog gets to licking you, it might realize you have an intriguing human taste that is a bit salty. Dogs love anything that has an interesting taste. Plus, licking is a way for your dog to explore his world. Youre part of that world after all.
Obsessive-Compulsive Behavior: Although its rare, dogs can suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder, often brought on by prolonged stress and anxiety. Licking that occurs constantly (and usually involves the licking of objects, surfaces, and self in addition to humans) may be a real problem. Talk to your veterinarian about your concerns about your dog. Your vet might refer you to an animal behaviorist for help. Your veterinarian or a veterinary behaviorist may also prescribe medication to help relieve anxiety. Though you may think medication should be a last resort, its important to understand that animals cannot learn while in a high state of anxiety. Medication may be used as a tool in conjunction with training. Pharmaceutical treatment may even be used temporarily while your dog goes through training and behavior modification.
Fact #4: Kissing Can Be a Sensory Behavior
Sometimes, the only reason your dog kisses you is because of a particularly (and pleasantly) pungent odor on your person.
“Maybe your skin is a little salty, or they like the smell of a certain lotion you’ve applied,” Arden says. This also suggests the obvious: If you just ate something that’s especially tasty and your dog catches a whiff of it, there’s a good chance he’ll suddenly feel like planting a nice wet one on you.
Are dog licks really kisses?
Our dogs might be our best friends and beloved family members, but that doesn’t mean we always understand them. While some of their behaviors are pretty easy to interpret – tail wagging for happiness, scratching at the door to go outside – others can leave us wondering. This Valentine’s Day, as we think about the love we share with our dogs, its worth trying to understand better how they show us love.
A dog licking your face or hands certainly seems affectionate – but is it? The answer is both yes and no. Yes, licks often indicate affection because your dog has learned the behavior: you like or appreciate the licks and thus give your dog snuggles or praise in return. So to make you happy, the dog will lick more. Even more basic to dog behavior is that licking is often a way that puppies communicate to their mothers that they’re ready to eat. So a dog may lick you to indicate hunger, be treated with a dog biscuit, and thus learn that licks make for a happy owner who gives out food.
Socially, lower-status dogs in the pack would lick higher-status dogs, so your dog may also be showing his respect for you when kissing you. But sometimes it’s more basic than that – your dog might lick you simply because you taste or smell good.
In any case, if you like dog licks, then it’s perfectly fine to praise your dog for this social interaction. But if you don’t like them, you can easily train your dog that licking is not acceptable. As with any training, be consistent in how you react to licks so your dog understands the expected behavior.
Dogs have plenty of other physical ways to showing you they love you – or if not love, then at least they feel comfortable around you and trust you. Some common dog signs of relaxed comfort include:
Dogs may also show affection by doing a behavior you’ve taught them to do. Since dogs want to please you, they may repeat these behaviors even without being asked.
Dogs, like people, vary widely in how they show emotion and how social they are. One dog may love couch snuggles and face licks, while another dog may sit stoically on the other side of the room from you. Often the behavior varies by breed, with some breeds craving close interaction with humans more than others. This varied behavior does not necessarily indicate a difference in affection; it’s just different ways of showing love based on the dog’s personality. That said, if your dog has always acted one way and then changes, this could be a sign of a problem, and you should consider a visit with your veterinarian.